Exploration of "I"

The theme of this poem is based on the discovery of identity within myself .  The poem illustrates my struggle to feel seen and heard outside of the perception of others.  It also touches on how those perceptions can feel like a trap or bind,  while the absence of these perceptions can feel lifeless.  In yoga philosophy we know that "I" expands beyond a body, personality or even our individual Spirit, yet in everyday living we have a strong identification with roles, characteristics and labels. 

I can't say that I always find myself believing in the ending of this poem. It's still a path of discovery for me.  Perhaps you will see something of yourself in this writing as well.

I

If you do not see me do I still exist?
Or am I like a tree falling soundlessly to the floor of an empty forest

If you do not hear my voice can I still speak?

Or does my voice die out before the sound passes my lips

If you do not touch me can I still feel?
Or does sensation cease,  leaving my skin numb and unresponsive

Where did I begin?
As a cell in the womb, unseen and unheard
Or when I emerged squirming and crying as a tiny baby drawing in my first breath

Where do I end?
At my toes or fingertips, crown of my head
Or at the place where you last acknowledged my presence

Who am I?
Cells, bones, and tissue that come together to form the body
Spirit and Divine Essense contained In a shell
Thoughts and memories, experiences and feelings
Or am I who you perceive me to be, created by your definition and expectations

If I am defined only by myself where does this lead?
Am I released into sweet freedom unbound by labels
Or placed in an empty void of invisibility

Who is this "I"

I am

The one I see even when others cannot
The one that hears my voice and speaks my truth
The one who feels moist skin, soft hair, the warm embrace of holding myself
The one who was created as Spirit and embodies Divinity
The one who will never end

I am allowed, only me, the sweet luscious truth of knowing "I"

January 2012